STORYTELLING REMAINS ONE of the most powerful ways to convey a concept or lesson. Interestingly, while the Qur’an provides many verses outlining the rules of marriage, it includes very few stories that demonstrate marriage through the lives of the Prophets. One notable exception, however, is found in the story of Musa (as), and it holds valuable lessons for every young man and woman seeking marriage — as well as their parents.
Musa (as) had just killed an Egyptian man by accident. News came to him that the Egyptian authorities were looking for him and would not spare him.
Allah relates what happened next in Surah al Qasas 21-28:
فَخَرَجَ مِنْهَا خَآئِفًۭا يَتَرَقَّبُ ۖ قَالَ رَبِّ نَجِّنِى مِنَ ٱلْقَوْمِ ٱلظَّـٰلِمِينَ
So Moses left the city in a state of fear and caution, praying: “My Lord! Deliver me from the wrongdoing people.”
وَلَمَّا تَوَجَّهَ تِلْقَآءَ مَدْيَنَ قَالَ عَسَىٰ رَبِّىٓ أَن يَهْدِيَنِى سَوَآءَ ٱلسَّبِيلِ
And as he made his way towards Midian, he said: “I trust my Lord will guide me to the right way.”
وَلَمَّا وَرَدَ مَآءَ مَدْيَنَ وَجَدَ عَلَيْهِ أُمَّةًۭ مِّنَ ٱلنَّاسِ يَسْقُونَ وَوَجَدَ مِن دُونِهِمُ ٱمْرَأَتَيْنِ تَذُودَانِ ۖ قَالَ مَا خَطْبُكُمَا ۖ قَالَتَا لَا نَسْقِى حَتَّىٰ يُصْدِرَ ٱلرِّعَآءُ ۖ وَأَبُونَا شَيْخٌۭ كَبِيرٌۭ
When he arrived at the well of Midian, he found a group of people watering (their herds). Apart from them, he noticed two women holding back (their herd). He asked (them): “What is the matter?” They replied: “We cannot water (our animals) until the (other) shepherds are done, for our father is a very old man.
فَسَقَىٰ لَهُمَا ثُمَّ تَوَلَّىٰٓ إِلَى ٱلظِّلِّ فَقَالَ رَبِّ إِنِّى لِمَآ أَنزَلْتَ إِلَىَّ مِنْ خَيْرٍۢ فَقِيرٌۭ
So he watered (their herd) for them, then withdrew to the shade and prayed: “My Lord! I am truly in (desperate) need of whatever provision You may have in store for me.”
فَجَآءَتْهُ إِحْدَىٰهُمَا تَمْشِى عَلَى ٱسْتِحْيَآءٍۢ قَالَتْ إِنَّ أَبِى يَدْعُوكَ لِيَجْزِيَكَ أَجْرَ مَا سَقَيْتَ لَنَا ۚ فَلَمَّا جَآءَهُۥ وَقَصَّ عَلَيْهِ ٱلْقَصَصَ قَالَ لَا تَخَفْ ۖ نَجَوْتَ مِنَ ٱلْقَوْمِ ٱلظَّـٰلِمِينَ
Then one of the two women came to him, walking bashfully. She said: “My father is inviting you so he may reward you for watering (our animals) for us.” When Moses came to him and told him his whole story, the old man said: “Have no fear! You are (now) safe from the wrongdoing people.”
قَالَتْ إِحْدَىٰهُمَا يَـٰٓأَبَتِ ٱسْتَـْٔجِرْهُ ۖ إِنَّ خَيْرَ مَنِ ٱسْتَـْٔجَرْتَ ٱلْقَوِىُّ ٱلْأَمِينُ
One of the two daughters suggested: “O my dear father! Hire him. A strong, trustworthy person is definitely the best to hire.”
قَالَ إِنِّىٓ أُرِيدُ أَنْ أُنكِحَكَ إِحْدَى ٱبْنَتَىَّ هَـٰتَيْنِ عَلَىٰٓ أَن تَأْجُرَنِى ثَمَـٰنِىَ حِجَجٍۢ ۖ فَإِنْ أَتْمَمْتَ عَشْرًۭا فَمِنْ عِندِكَ ۖ وَمَآ أُرِيدُ أَنْ أَشُقَّ عَلَيْكَ ۚ سَتَجِدُنِىٓ إِن شَآءَ ٱللَّهُ مِنَ ٱلصَّـٰلِحِينَ
The old man proposed: “I wish to marry one of these two daughters of mine to you, provided that you stay in my service for eight years. If you complete ten, it will be (a favour) from you, but I do not wish to make it difficult for you. Allah willing, you will find me an agreeable man.”
قَالَ ذَٰلِكَ بَيْنِى وَبَيْنَكَ ۖ أَيَّمَا ٱلْأَجَلَيْنِ قَضَيْتُ فَلَا عُدْوَٰنَ عَلَىَّ ۖ وَٱللَّهُ عَلَىٰ مَا نَقُولُ وَكِيلٌۭ
Moses responded: “(Then) it is (settled) between you and I. Whichever term I fulfil, there will be no (further) obligation on me. And Allah is a Witness to what we say.”
Lessons for Young Men
- Reliance on Allah: Musa (as) turned to Allah at every stage — in fear, in uncertainty, and in need. His trust was sincere and unwavering.
- Awareness and Integrity: Despite his exhaustion and dire circumstances, Musa (as) noticed the two women and chose to help them, not to impress, but simply because it was the right thing to do.
- Modesty and Discipline: When the woman came to invite him to meet her father, Musa walked ahead while she directed from behind, demonstrating restraint and respect.
- Honesty: When meeting her father, he didn’t hide his past. He was truthful, even though his story of a penniless fugitive could have easily been misunderstood.
- Work Ethic: He accepted the offer to work — not just for eight, but ten years. This shows his dedication, responsibility, and gratitude.
Takeaway: A young man seeking marriage should focus on building taqwa, character, and resilience. True provision comes from Allah (in this case the response to his dua for provision came as a wife, home and livelihood), and sincerity opens doors that strength or wealth alone cannot.
Lessons for Young Women
- Discernment: The daughter noticed Musa’s character — his strength, his trustworthiness, and his modesty. She compared this to the behaviour of other men and saw his distinction clearly.
- Modesty: She approached Musa (as) with haya (shyness), communicating on behalf of her father — maintaining boundaries and dignity.
- Initiative Within Bounds: Recognizing his character, she suggested to her father that he hire Musa — a subtle, respectful way of expressing her admiration and interest.
Takeaway: Look for inner strength, integrity, and taqwa in a man. And pursue matters of the heart with wisdom, modesty, and through proper channels.
Lessons for Parents
- Character Over Wealth and Status: The father didn’t ask about Musa’s wealth, lineage, or social standing. He carefully assessed his character and judged him by his actions.
- Openness to Daughter’s Insight: He valued and considered his daughter’s suggestion seriously — a sign of wisdom and mutual respect.
- Providing Opportunity, Not Pressure: His marriage proposal was reasonable and generous. He allowed Musa (as) to choose the term of service and reassured him of fairness.
Takeaway: Look beyond status and focus on akhlaq (character) and amanah (trustworthiness). Support your children’s instincts when they see good in someone, and guide them with compassion and wisdom.
Living For Islam 